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Blog
Goings on
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November 2011
23 entries this month
2169 total entries
Honor: 2,536 [ Give / Take ]
02:56:58 - Nov 30 2011
Times Read: 152
I need to refocus. I keep losing sight of the small steps I need to complete in order to accomplish the bigger goal. When I think of the overall goal, I feel overwhelmed.
The two main objectives I need to focus on now is finding a full time job in my field, and completing my math courses...
Baby steps.
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Lmao fml.
01:42:14 - Nov 30 2011
Times Read: 154
So we are getting a new "Fuck me silly" head in at our store this week. We now have all the cyber skin parts to make an entire person... except they will have dinosaur arms but in the end... that isn't the best part about it.
What IS the best part is, the head we are getting in... Looks exactly like me. Same hair cut, blue eyes, shape of face everything...
-_-
Not too fond of the idea of some of the men who come into work skull fucking something that suction cups to the shower wall that looks like me.... Jussaying.
Things like this prove that life was never supposed to be taken seriously.
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Do not ask for an easy life, but the strength to endure a hard one.
02:58:24 - Nov 28 2011
Times Read: 164
22 was a fantastic year.
Learned so much about myself and grew as a professional and as a person. Slowly turning into a woman who knows what she wants and not a little girl who is sick of trying to figure it out.
I am calmer, more at peace with myself and for the time being, I know what I want out of my life. I am happy and content, and I feel that I will be able to handle the next big thing that comes along to try and rattle my life.
I graduated, I went skydiving, I am on my way to getting my first car, I am completing a math course when I thought I would never ever be able to accomplish even one simple math lesson.
The biggest lesson I learned from working at C.A.S. was that I wasn't confident in my abilities. I also learned that when people tell you to take care of yourself, you really do need to. The world is filled with violence negativity, but the world harbours a need for balance. For as much violence and negativity there also Love and positivity. Whatever end of the spectrum you feel most is up to you.
Working with the youth also made me realise that I need to make a difference and I am on the right track in my professional life.
I am a calmer person now, more confident and self assured. I am able to look people in the eyes and know that I am a person of value and that no matter what they think or say or do.. I am who I am.
Also, I have been able to say No, to people in my life I have had the hardest time turning away. I can put my foot down, and finally say Not my problem". I can still be there for them... but I don't shoulder their problems the way I did. I can move over and give them the space to fix their own problems. And i feel better for it.
It sounds simple and stupid but I swear most of the hardest things we learn in life are the simplest of things.
For now, I am happy and content.
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06:58:55 - Nov 26 2011
Times Read: 175
I can't even believe it.
:)
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04:03:30 - Nov 26 2011
Times Read: 177
Whoohoo I am getting faster. Went for a run that usually takes me about an hour, did it in less than 45 minutes!
Now... more last minute plans to go out!
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05:12:09 - Nov 25 2011
Times Read: 183
I only like reading horoscopes at the end of the day when I can see how much they actually reflect the happenings of that day. This one is actually pretty accurate.
Take care of your home base today, Christina, both physically and emotionally. See that your bills are taken care of and that your bedroom is clean. Don't forget to clean out the dirt from under your bed, and the demons from inside your mind. Realize that you might be operating with someone else's program disk that got stuck in your hard drive. Make sure you replace it with your own system disk before you continue onward.
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16:21:21 - Nov 24 2011
Times Read: 186
So many strange dreams this morning. One I was trapped in an abandoned house when a van of three men pulled up to the drive way. I hid by the window. One of them came in and found me and tried to protect me from the other two guys.
Then I was in a bar with friends, and they had called three other friends there to have an 'intervention' about their immature behaviour?
And one more that I forget... something about a car and the end of the world... :)
And I go my math unit back last night, I got a 90%! I haven't gotten a 90% on anything math related in years... I just can't believe it.
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03:51:31 - Nov 24 2011
Times Read: 189
Aced my first math course! No idea how.. but I did :)
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03:33:02 - Nov 23 2011
Times Read: 202
So I am thinking about getting the surgery for my face to get the facial nerve working on the right side of my face....
:)
Hopefully this means I will have my smile back two years after I lost it. And apparently, botox will help with the synkenisis I am experiencing with the wrongly repaired nerves.
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17:14:04 - Nov 21 2011
Times Read: 221
I had a dream it was near the end of the world and I was riding a bus with a bunch of other people trying to get away. Then I went back in time and was running for the bus and missed it, then continued to run along the road. even though i went less than a mile down the road, it turned dark and I knew I was in danger. I climbed over fallen bamboo sticks and kept trudging through mud trying to get to the other road. Once I did, it was dark and windy and I tried running back to where I had been even though I was going forward (made no sense). I almost got hit by cars as they came around the curves in the road.
*sigh*
This dream shows that I am going in circles about something, and I have chosen two different paths...
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The Stand
04:05:20 - Nov 21 2011
Times Read: 224
The book I am reading now is one of the best so far and I don't regret picking up the extended version of an already long book.
Definitely recommend it. The story starts off fast, no slow build up. In true SK fashion he jumps from each story line but in a way that keeps you hooked, not causes you to get lost. Only thing I wish he did was incorporate more countries instead of just America but considering it's a book, not a series like the dark Tower series.. it makes sense to stick to one country.
I am in love with some of the characters an can't stand others... and I kind of see where the story could be going. Although with SK.. hard to tell sometimes.
:)
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01:12:40 - Nov 20 2011
Times Read: 238
My e-mail was blocked and I am glad it was, it was apparently sending out porn links and such???? Ah well... hopefully it will be fixed ooor... NEW EMAIL for me!!!!!! :)
Sparrow came into work this morning, distraught and having a panic attack... then proceeded to quit. :( Also it was Sam's last day, her baby is due on my birthday!!! One more month!! :)
*siiiiiigh* Wine, and chocolate. Lets go.
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04:29:07 - Nov 19 2011
Times Read: 246
My friend just got back from Japan and OMG! I want to go!!! I am seeing him on Monday to talk about his trip but I just went through his pics and it looks like a place, I have never seen before (Probably because it is) but wow..
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PRIVATE ENTRY
04:33:04 - Nov 13 2011
Times Read: 316
* * * PRIVATE JOURNAL ENTRY * * *
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16:45:37 - Nov 12 2011
Times Read: 327
2 out of 3 girls... Two similar but totally different situations. Sad thing is I saw this coming, but I just hoped it wouldn't actually happen. There were signs, and they both mentioned things to me. What could I have done differently?
What can I do now?
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04:38:49 - Nov 12 2011
Times Read: 337
Last minute plans to go out, usually end up being the best ones ;)
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04:07:52 - Nov 12 2011
Times Read: 338
I have been running once or twice a day for over a month now. Sometimes for 20 mins, sometimes over an hour. It's been great.
I have been drinking more green tea and eating a lot more veggies, fruit and lean meat...
Oddly, this seems to be working for me and I'll tell you why.
I let myself cheat now and again and don't beat the crap out of myself for doing it. I have a glass of wine here or there... some chocolate or cookies once in a while and I still have coffee three or four times a week.
Eating properly for my main meals makes me not want to eat crap because now, when I do... it tastes like ass. I crave fresh food now, especially crispy veggies and juicy fruits. :)
Now, I just have to incorporate strength training into my schedule. I don't actually enjoy strength training when it actually feels like exercising for the sake of exercising. So I am thinking about taking up kick boxing :) Or a self defense class.
This has a second motive behind it too. A girl at my work was attacked the other day and with christmas hours getting extended I end up having to leave work later, and wait by my stop, alone, later as well... Even though I carry a knife, I still think I would be better off if I knew how to fend off an attacker. And maybe gets some abs in the long run too :)
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01:22:02 - Nov 09 2011
Times Read: 363
Suhwwweeeet Might be getting a job with Our Place Peel as a frontline worker!!! Basically the same job I had with C.A.S. but with older youth.
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13:54:04 - Nov 08 2011
Times Read: 372
Couldn't fall asleep last night. My mind was racing, and I felt excited and anxious all at once...
Oddly, the thought of having a baby popped into my head, shortly to follow was an extreme feeling of terror and anxiety. The mind is a powerful thing I guess. I am not in any danger of getting pregnant as I am not involved with anyone, but for some reason, the thought stuck with me... and I was on the verge of tears.
The main thought was that if I were ever to conceive a baby, once born, I would end up hurting it some how. I am my mother's child after all, and My biggest fear is that I will hurt my baby the same way she hurt us. I won't have an abortion, I don't think it's wrong but personally I just can't see myself going through with it. After all, I am old enough to take responsibility for my actions, so if I get pregnant I have to suck it up and deal.
But fuck I can't ever have a baby.
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03:08:50 - Nov 08 2011
Times Read: 375
I should have gone into Nursing. I was checking out the local hospitals for social work jobs and there are 4... Registered Nurses??? 35 or so...
Definitely chose the wrong profession in regards to job availability. that ratio is just about the same in any clinical setting unfortunately... Just means I am going to have to set myself above the rest when I start doing my clinicals at U of T for Psychiatry.
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18:50:59 - Nov 06 2011
Times Read: 390
Went to bed upset, had a dream that made it worse, now still can't shake this feeling. It will pass. Having some friends over tonight to watch the Walking Dead and a movie. That will cheer me up.
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03:51:25 - Nov 05 2011
Times Read: 408
Seems like Australia might be next on the list :) Customer service and ticketing agents needed??? I am there.
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AWN
23:13:34 - Nov 02 2011
Times Read: 427
We got new collars in at work *love*
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Angelus
13:23:05
Nov 30 2011